Fear Cripples The Spirit, While Love Opens Up the Heart

Fear Cripples The Spirit, While Love Opens Up the Heart

A relationship between two people who love and support each other will open up the heart, let in the sunlight, and produce harmony for both. The other side of that equation is that fear cripples the spirit, shuts down possibility and destroys all that you dream and hope to achieve.

As humans we are extremely complex but within the complexity, some simple truths are self-evident. Such self-evident truths are, ‘love is healthy, hatred is destructive’. ‘Anger eats you up inside, while forgiveness bring peace of mind’. All faiths teach these basic truths because they are observable to reasonable people over time and have thus have become constant observable truths.

When you find yourself in a relationship feeling fear and anger, you need to find the causes of those feelings, and the pathway out of these self-defeating attitudes. Otherwise they will destroy yourself and the relationship you are hoping to build. Fear has many causes, but usually it is the result of attempting to control life so you will not re-experience a past event that produced the fear you fear to feel again.

Perhaps you have experienced a horrific event in the past, and are bringing the feelings of that occurrence into the present. By carrying the unhealthy experience within, you are probably hoping to stop feeling the feelings you felt when that experience occurred before. Thus you are unconsciously holding onto emotional junk as a defense against feeling it again. Better to let it go and trust that if it shows up again you shall know how to handle this one differently. Then you can really face your fears with a new power and with new vitality. Carrying the pain around inside is disastrous for you, your partner and everyone who is close to you.

An appropriate path away from fear is to surrender to what you cannot change, and accept the mystery of life and the gift that is beyond human understanding. But before we find this secret pathway out of fear, most of us get bogged down in the futile attempt to control life, other people, your lover, and even your own unchangeable nature, which will lead to frustration and more fear.

Fear is the great cripple. President Roosevelt (physically crippled, but emotional strong) during the great depression said that fear created much of the suffering of the time and added, "The only thing we need to fear is fear itself.” How true. How wise. Of course it has been said may times and in many ways. We must all face our inner demons that produce the fear and leads us to overly controlling our lives and the lives of our loved ones. Until we begin the battle and overcome the inner demons we become paralyzed by our own negative feelings.

In the second story of Star Wars, “The Empire Strikes Back”, George Lucas presented this simple truth so graphically when Luke had to fight Daeth Vader during his training to become a Jedi knight. Yoda sent him into the wilderness to face his demons. After fighting the evil Vader, and cutting off his head, Luke saw the enemy. Daeth Vader was himself. The head he had dislodged was his own face. Fear is our own worst enemy, and fear must be conquered if we want to have peace of mind, happiness and success in relationship.

The cartoon character Pogo expressed this truth so wonderfully when he said, “We have met the enemy and he is us”. Now that simple statement is a universal truth.